V/H/S 2

Just released On Demand the other day is V/H/S 2 it's the second of I'm sure many to come in the V/H/S Horror Movie series, Also make sure to check it out in Theater's July 12, 2013. V/H/S 2 is about - While Searching for a missing student, two private investigators break into his house and find a collection of VHS tapes. Viewing the horrific contents of each cassette, they realize there may be dark motives behind the student's disappearance.

From the Directors of The Raid, Hobo With A Shotgun, You're Next and The Blair Witch Project! This made me really excited about seeing this movie as I loved every single one of those movies!

Don't want to spoil anything so without saying what each tape is about, I'll tell you my thoughts on each one. I went into watching this movie without seeing any Trailers for it at all, so i'd be completely surprised about everything in this movie, and I'm glad i did that cuz i had no clue what so ever what was in this movie!

The First Tape is pretty awesome! Directed by Adam Wingard. Brings The Scares, n Creepy shit in full effect, If you're a pussy grab a blanket and wrap yourself up n cover your eye's

The Second Tape Brings the gore and i guess if you have a twisted mind a little humor as i laughed a little bit during this amazing tape! Directed by Eduardo Sanchez and Gregg Hale

The Third Tape Written & Directed by Timo Tjahjanto & Gareth Huw Evans is my favorite of the 4. It's subtitled as it's not in English not sure what the exact language is Chinese or Mandarin or something else, but I'm sure if this was in English it wouldn't be nearly as awesome, Each tape just keeps outdoing the last all i gotta say is this tape... Holy Shit!! Fucking Love It!

The Fourth Tape was really well done about a subject matter that's never really interested me but the Director Jason Eisener did an amazing job turning this into an entertaining story! I really enjoyed it alot.

What in my mind sets this apart from other Horror movies is this is like 5 short Horror Movies in one 4 Tapes and the main story to make it a feature film and not just 5 short story's! each is packed full of creepy shit, good scares, gore, blood, and titties and all the other ingredients to make an awesome movie! while other horror movies spread a few scares here n there within a full length feature film, I watch ton's of Horror Movies and haven't seen one this amazing in a while! I recommend you watch it with a lady friend with the lights off! Also this movie gets bonus points for having some nice ass titties in it!!! and some of the goriest scenes you'll ever see in a movie! I've been sitting here for about 30 minutes now since the movie ended and all i can think is what the fuck did i just watch... and WOW... I have a pretty twisted mind and I've just witnessed shit i could never of imagined!

Overall if you liked or loved V/H/S 1 you will SHIT OUT YOUR VAGINA! for this one!! it's that fucking good!! And in my opinion WAY better then V/H/S 1 and i loved the first one! and cannot wait for a 3rd installment!!

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The Entity

The Entity is the true story of a single mother of four (only 3 made the cut) who claims to have been repeatedly raped by a ghost! The mother visited a psychiatrist who she grew quite close to, but it wasn't until she was speaking about it to her friend in public, that in a chance encounter she had the opportunity to explore the paranormal possibilities her psychiatrist refused to consider. A group of paranormal investigators over hear the conversation and begin monitoring her house for the entity as the attacks reach new ferocious levels. I don't want to spoil anything so I'll leave it at that. The movie is based off the book "The Entity" which was written by an author who was right there while the attacks were investigated. Unfortunately like the fourth child I don't recall he made the cut either. Overall the possibility of the Entity's truth is it's most intriguing aspect, because the creators failed to go outside the box much with the story. In a special feature an eyewitness tells his account of what happened and he pretty much repeats every moment you just watched explaining that certain things weren't as extreme as the movie made it seem. The Entity sports some great effects and stylish directing, but it was just too slow and plodding at 2 hours and not enough rapes to hold my full attention. Then again it's pretty hard to not recommend violent ghost rape and everyone should probably witness the invisible fist jacking her jaw before it goes to work. If you like Rosemary's Baby and Paranormal Activity you might want to check this. Me? I'll just wait for a poltergeist porn parody, "Carol Anne is all grown up and ready to F...."

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Goosebumps Episode 1 - The Girl Who Cried Monster!

So sitting here at around 2AM eating mac n cheese n drinking Budweiser with my brother we decided to turn on Netflix and to my pleasant surprise Goosebumps was add to the selection of awesomeness which is Netflix!!

A throwback to my childhood bringing back all the fond memories of how great television was when i was growing up Episode One is about a girl name Lucy who was telling so many tall-tale monster stories that she is disgusting her friends and family, Lucy doesn't know what to do when she discovers a real monster in the summer reading program librarian... SCARY SHIT!  well atleast when i was a kid it was haha, but if your reading this while growing up with todays kids shows check out Goosebumps and find out what real kids TV shows are made of! This episode was first aired in February 1996 and is amazing with a twist ending making you want to come back for more!!

If your not blessed with Netflix watch the episode here on youtube!

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Mars Attacks: the classics vol. 1

Mars Attacks, the title that swept the world with controversy in 1962 has been rejuvenated for a new era. Step back in time to 1962, schools and churches gathered the violent little pictures of the depraved race and burned them in bonfires across North America in a true display of sanity (sarcasm). Given the 50th anniversary of the martian invasion the original card collection was released for a limited time (If anyone has an extra #2 please I beg you to send it my way it's all I'm missing). Along with the cards a new comic book series was developed with a ton of merchandise I've been asking for since before Tim Burton came along to sour the Mars Attacks name. Don't get me wrong I love the Mars Attacks movie, it's endlessly hilarious, but it also made the martians appear much weaker than they were originally portrayed. This seems to have put the weakest of the martian species in the front of everyone's memory and wiped out the sinister beast that once was. The new series which has had spinoff one shots in which Mars takes on everything from the Ghostbusters to Transformers is a new low to the series, I flipped through them in the comic book store and the entire story was nearly void of anything other than the martians losing on every damn page they are printed on (and the art totally fucking sucks). Sadly the new series focuses way too much on the human characters. This had me completely defeated with disappointment until I flipped through another book butted up with those that don't belong,  Mars Attacks: the classics vol. 1!

In Mars Attacks: the classics volume one we witness the beginnings of the Martian invasion in great detail with amazing grotesque artwork that will froth the loins of every true fan of the little green people of Mars! While not the best written piece of work this issue is the key foundation to everything that happens in the better written volume 2 which I'm currently halfway through. Given I know what follows I can say that this story line although not the best at first really catches fire and is leading to an unforgettable and smart story that dare I say might have even been ahead of it's time. Act fast if you want this collection I had to order my #1 online after being informed by the comic book store that this mid 2012 release is already out of print.

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A Little Bit Zombie

A catty bridezilla (Tina) drags her fiance Steve's family (Sister Sarah, and jock brother in law Craig) out to a small cabin to plan the final steps of her wedding, make table centre pieces and all that other tedious annoying shit that comes with the big day. But after being attacked by an un-killable mosquito the jokes about a groom's funeral come too close to home, as the soon to be groom begins getting literal cold feet. Even though Steve's heart has stopped he will do anything to not break Tina's hiding his growing hunger until the instinct to feed becomes uncontrollable. Steve's an all around nice dude though and still continues to try and find ways to overcome his illness and avoid eating from his friend's chattering brain bowls. Once our zombie friend's secret is revealed, the group bands together to help poor Steve find a way to continue leading a normal quality of life. While our heroes look for answers a zombie hunter sniffs out the stiff in hopes of ending his un-death.

It's gotta be hard to come up with an original zombie film these days and it's so refreshing to find one that isn't stale. I really dug this zombie flick. All the talent were charismatic and fun for the roles. The bickering relationship between Steve's fiance and sister was believable and actually kind of charming as was Craig's over confidence and loveable douche-baggery. The effects were goofy and fun with some light gore giving the production enough balls to sell the punchline.

A Little Bit Zombie falls in line of other impressive recent horror comedies AHHH! Zombies, and the kick ass Rock n' Roll Vampire picture, Suck!

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